I think a lot of people in this world set out to do good things for themselves and others, but then get sidetracked and pulled away from their original good intention. I began my farming journey with the intention of growing food that I could share with the food-insecure of my community. Along the way so far, I have experienced some valuable course deviations.
First, there is a “prestige” that comes from announcing the intention to do a good thing like helping feed the hungry. In the beginning, people would frequently ask me what my farming dream was and I would say “I want to increase food access.” That is still true, but continuing to stay focused and motivated after the newness has worn off is where the true challenge lies. Once the initial enthusiasm and interest dies away, and it is time to do the unseen work, how does one stay the course?
I’m actually figuring that part out right now, and I think the experiences I am having right now are exceptionally valuable to me in this year of learning. A big lesson that I have learned so far is I can’t do it all so I need to make sure there are boundaries to what I can take on and what I commit to.
In the beginning, I had wild enthusiasm for everything in the food system. I wanted to grow the food, distribute the food, cook the food, serve the food, and even eat the food. That is the full food system, and it is too much for one person to do. I can not be everything in the food system or else I will get no where. This problem of spreading myself too thin is exacerbated by my personal dislike of team work and my constantly changing curiosity. I basically spread myself in too many directions very quickly and then my follow-through falls off dramatically because I can’t deliver on that many obligations. I am a great starter with an immense talent for generating new ideas, but I am still developing my finisher abilities.
That is the first challenge in a nutshell, but the second challenge I face is focus drift. Again, what started out as a desire to increase food access has grown and morphed it’s way through new ideas and experiences and inventions in a dizzying array of doing that has been hard for others to understand and keep up with. Most people, I assume, have an idea and either do nothing with it or spend a long time developing and building it up. I have ideas and throw myself fully headfirst into them with exceptional enthusiasm and vigor. However, doing this can seem incredibly confusing to others because they are constantly saying “what happened to…” some idea I already moved on from.
This is not new for me. I have been this constantly curious and dramatically changing person since I was a kid. My parents used to describe me as someone with a lot of irons in the fire. Many of the people in my life can’t keep up with my constant changes in interests and activities, and even fewer maintain any enthusiasm for whatever my latest idea is. I’m basically like an inventor who is constantly working on something new in search of that one thing that is going to make it all worth while.
So what am I trying to “invent” with all my constantly changing new ideas and business plans? I’m trying to create positive change for people in need. I believe there are two ways to succeed in creating big social change: 1. Hit the same spot over and over again until you break through, or 2. Hit the barriers-to-change over and over in different spots till you find the weak point that breaks. Given my personality and experience, I will continue to test the fence.
My biggest fear is that I will exert all my energy and resources and not accomplish anything because I’m constantly bouncing around on new ideas. That is a real possibility and danger. So to keep myself grounded and focused in order to increase my likelihood of success, I have to maintain a touchstone. I have to maintain a centering point that I continually come back to and remind myself that my actions and efforts are for that purpose. For me that touchstone is helping others. Before taking on a new task or a new idea, I must ask myself will this action help someone else and is the cost of it something I can bare? And if the answers are yes, then I know it is something worth doing.
But for the sake of increased odds of succeeding in creating a sustainable benefit for others in the local food system, I have to refine these questions by more specifically saying “will this action help someone have increased access to food?” and “does it come at a cost I am willing to bare?”
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